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Meh

Just because I talk about games, doesn’t mean I’ll review them. Maybe nit-pick about glaring issues, but that’s prolly going to be the extent of it.

So what will I drivel on about here? Technology? Wow, THAT’S interesting. Politics? Gimme a break, I’m not a bloody news anchor (you want witty political satire? Go watch T.V.). The world at large? Sorry, don’t give two shits whats going on outside (by and large).

The biggest reason I don’t do anything like that is because I’ve the Vocabulary skill of a retarded pit bull fresh out of collage. I might pull off some drooling and snarling, but that pretty much sums it up.

So where does that leave me? Buggered if I know, but I think I’ll take a stab at all of the above. Then I’ll wallow is my own misery (mainly consisting of my own excrement and the blood of virgin plague rats), probably try to play it off as a half attempt at wit and proceed to wash down the gurry I spew with the aforementioned “misery”.

The more I think of it, the more it makes me want to brush up on my dictionary reading. Then I remember this wonderful thing called video games an’ I just say Frag it.

Now don’t get me wrong (or do, I don’t give two shits of a leper chicken), I’ve read plenty of books. Ranging from fantasy to non-fiction, much like my video games and music. There will be sterling example of them, the overflowing ewer of fecal matter, and my personal off limit pieces (with their exception that prove my own rules)

I’ve already mentioned games, so I’ll go off on music. Generally I’ll listen to most everything, and easily discern (relatively) the true gems in the never-ending seas of Crapulon V. But my overall rule is the almost strict avoidance of  “Country”. I’ll admit there are good bands/singer/whateveryoucall’em, but I’ve been informed that the ones I do prefer are not (strictly speaking) “Country”. Thus my exception that proves my rule. And no, if anyone asks, I couldn’t name them to save my life. I have enough issues remembering my own without storing the names of others without something important possibly being moved out of the way.

Next being books. I’ll read most anything, so long as the writing holds up long enough for me to turn the bloody page. The one genre that I avoid like its last month mulched diapers left in the august sun, is “Mysteries”. Most of them have the compelling writing of a drunken two year old after a month on mescaline. Now, to date, I’ve yet to encounter a “mystery” novel I was able to pallet. And no, I’m not taking suggestion.

There are a few books/games/music I just out and out refuse to read/play/listen to. Anything J.R.R. Tolken I will not read, have no intention to read, and will die never knowing what the hell a “Frodo” is. I’m sure this might get some rabid fanboy into a psychotic frenzy frightening enough to make Paris Hiltons chihuahua pee itself. I’ve no intention to play anything of the Ninja Gaiden series. People say how “hardcore” it is and blisteringly difficult. Y’know what else is difficult to do with resulting blisters? Fapping with a waffle maker plugged into 220 while simultaneously nailing your hand to your forehead while singing the Canadian national anthem. And no, internet goers, that is not a dare. And no, I am not going to reconsider (the game, not the fapping). Anything JayZ makes me want to puke, so I’m not going to elaborate on that (I’ve used up all my funny, and JayZ is an easy target anywho).

Movies are the one thing I’ve watched so little of to have a preference, really. Is it funny (to me)? Cool. Is it interesting (to me)? Cool. Is it not any of the above? Change it. I didn’t get a PS3 to watch movies, I got it to play games.

Beh, I just watched 666 words pass by, so that might be my cue to wrap this up. I need to recharge my Rantometer.

KTHXBYE